A Crochet Troll Story With Patterns


The whole story!
I wrote most all the chapters, a long time ago. As I designed the patterns I made up stories to go with them for my facebook page members. It was told over a long stretch of time, from pattern release to pattern release.
Today I figured it would be great to gather all those up and give them to you in one post so you could read the full story in one go. I hope you enjoy!

All pattern links will be in a list at the bottom of the story.

Once upon a yarny time,  
3 Billy Goats stopped by my house and rang my doorbell. They were looking for directions.
I asked them, "Where would you like to go?"

They said they were looking for a bridge.

I knew where the bridge was but something told me, something like a gut instinct, that they should take the highway instead..

I told them, "Take the highway instead."

They all screamed at me, all three at once, "Bridge! Bridge! Bridge!"

Well, that was annoying.
When they were done screaming at me I happily gave them directions to the bridge! And that wasn't nice of me, I know....


Karma came for me, lol 

The very next day I woke up to a ruckus in my kitchen. I came out to investigate and could not believe my eyes! There was a Troll with those 3 Billy Goats. He had them tied to a rope.

"What are you doing?!!" I asked.

The Troll said he found the goats crossing his bridge. Since he had already eaten, and was feeling very full, he decided to sell them to me.

Omg! I didn't want them!


I told that Troll,
"They're noisy and obnoxious. It was just yesterday they were standing on my porch screaming at me to give them directions to the bridge. All 3 at once, screaming, 'Bridge! Bridge! Bridge!' Goodness me, they were so obnoxious. I was so happy to see them leave and now, here they are, all 3 in my kitchen!"

But the goats were quiet as mice today and looking rather humble.

The middle goat bumped the smallest one towards me, as if to say, you ask!
The smallest one, which is also the cutest, said in a whisper "Save us! We'll be quiet! We'll be nice! We promise! If the Troll gets hungry, he'll eat us! Save us, please!"

How could I refuse this whispered plea? UGH!

With a sigh and a roll of my eyes, I asked the Troll how much and we worked out a deal that left me quite broke.

Now I have three obnoxious Billy Goats and I just wanted to ask you all, do ya need a goat?
Yes, you do want one? Okay, pattern is here

Yay, the goats are gone, thank you!
Once I got rid of those obnoxious goats, and my house had returned to the normal, look who appeared again!


I asked them, "What do you want?"
And they all replied at the same time, "Pancakes".

"What?! You want me to make YOU pancakes?"

I couldn't believe the nerve of these Trolls. What am I? A restaurant! First, I'm forced to buy 3 obnoxious goats that I didn't want and now they want me to make them pancakes. pfft

One said with a grunt, as he walked over to my table and made himself at home, "We're tired of bridge food, make us pancakes".
The other one followed him and said, "Yes, with butter and syrup. Lots of syrup. We love syrup! Do you got any coffee? We want coffee."

Wow! I stood there for a minute or so just blinking at them, at a loss for words. What could I do? I shook my head and let out a sarcastic laugh.

And then there I was, making pancakes and coffee for a bunch of Trolls.
After they ate and drank up all my coffee  they left. Whew!

But then....

knock knock knock

There was somebody at my door, pfft, I don't want anymore visitors today!

I opened the door but nobody was there. Just before I closed the door I happened to look down and that's when I saw them; Elbus, Willie and Bubba. Oh no! Not the Trolls again!

Before they could ask me for anything I told them straight up,

"Listen guys, I'm not making you pancakes, and no, I don't have any coffee for you, and goodness me, I don't want anymore freaking goats! I have no time for you 3 so kindly go back from where you came from and leave me alone."

As I was telling them this, they walked right past me and jumped up on my table.. they never listen to what I say!


Then I saw him!
Well, I saw a tiny butt first, walking behind them.. a wee tiny troll butt. It's so much cuter than those bigger ones.



"A baby! You have a baby? Oh my goodness, he's soooo cu..... he's sooooo tiny!"

Tiny is what you say when... well, you know.

"Tell me! Who's baby is it!"

But not one of them would lay a claim to him. Willie said they were hunting under a bridge yesterday and there he was. They named him Bug.

Now Bug was super cute but I did end having to sacrifice him to the Yarn Gods. Yes, yes I did and that's the next part to this story. Do prepare yourselves, it's grim.

A sacrifice to the Yarn Gods. The Troll story continues,

Weeeeeeeeeeee! A cute little baby Troll that I couldn't resist! He was so adorably hideous I fell instantly in love! And I promised you all, my friends out there, a pattern for Bug so you could have a hideous baby Troll too.

And then it happened. Something terrible!

I thought to myself, "No need to write the pattern down, I'll remember what I did" Ya right. Take it from me and never do that! Write all the things done, all of them, always.

Days went by, followed by weeks, and to my horror, I forgot how to make him!

I tried and tried to recreate him, I kept getting close, but I just couldn't recreate that tiny, hideous, baby that had first appeared! What should I do?

Make the Sacrifice,
Okay little Bug. This is going to hurt but I have to do it! I have to unravel you and write you out row by row.

Nooooooooooooooo!

Yes. I had to. I unraveled him from the bum up and counted the stitches in each row and I wrote that pattern down! And finally, I had the pattern.

But poor little Bug,
There he was, just twisty pile of yarn. It was grim indeed. A baby Troll no longer and I was so sad. I missed Bug! I heard him mumble from that pile of twisty yarn, "It's okay, don't be sad crazy lady, you can make more of me now".

And I did, 
I made many little baby Trolls! But now I kind of I wish I never did that. They are horrible little creatures, seriously, nothing but trouble.



Spring Trolls in my backyard, 
I ended up calling the pattern for the baby, "Spring Troll" to reflect new life and blooming and all that good stuff.

One sunny day I brought them to my backyard where they could get some fresh air, check out the grass, soak up the sun! I told them, "It's fun out there, adventure awaits you!" 



They were running around, I could see little bits of their colorful hair as they darted around here and there in the grass and the buttercups. What a happy sight indeed.
However, I saw the grass part and out came one of them.   

"Where's the shade?" he asked in a gruff little voice, his face screwed up to one side.


So I thought I could help the situation by showing  him just how fun the backyard can be. I picked him up and handed him a dandelion puff. Everyone loves those puffs, right? They're fun!

"What's this for?" He asked with his face showing no signs of having a good time.

I told him it was to make a wish.

I said, " Make a wish, little guy, and then blow on the dandelion puff. All the little seeds will carry your wish away to where it can come true!"

He took a long look at the puff and then took a long look at me and said, rather rudely, "NO".

Geez.


What about that pattern?
I told you the sacrifice I made to get the pattern and I really wanted to give it to you but now that I'm thinking about it, I have to ask, do you really want to make one?


Actually, I would suggest you leave this page at once and  forget about them.
I know, I know! They look colorful and they have a lovely name but, please, go find yourself a peaceful pattern. These are troublesome little things, they get into everything! And depending on what your yarn ends up producing, you might even get a cranky little Troll who won't even  make wishes. No, you don't want to make one. Trust me.

You're still here?

I see you are still reading this page. I'm trying to warn you! Okay, you need proof. Here's just a few examples of what I go through since I've made these Spring Trolls.
  • I go to get a teaspoon of sugar for my tea and there's a clump inside the bowl, one I can't scoop up. A hard clump, you know, when sugar gets wet then left to dry. They slobber in the sugar bowl! Gross.
  • They run around inside the flower pots just to kick the dirt out! I'm constantly sweeping floors. It makes me tired just thinking about it.
  • They crawl under throw rugs just to make a mess of them. This drives me insane! I'm forever straightening them out.
  • They make knots in all my yarn balls, on purpose! Why do they do this? Why?!
There's more to tell you, lots more, but I'm too busy right now untangling my yarn.

Oh alright, if you insist,
Pattern for the Spring Troll is here
Pattern for the large Troll (called Bobble Troll)  is here
Pattern for the goat is here

I did make those baby Trolls clothes to wear. I mean, nobody really wants to look at naked little troublemakers. Best put some clothes on them.  The outfit pattern is  here.


I hope you enjoyed the story today and that it brought a smile to your wonderful face!

If you do make any of the characters in this story, I'd sure love to see! Post pictures on my facebook page Amigurumi Freely.

Take care of yourselves, see you again real soon. Lots of love.

Comments

  1. Very cute story, and thanks for the patterns! Val

    ReplyDelete
  2. You’ve actually made my day with an adorable amigurumi but your story kept me so enthralled!!! Thank you so much!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. hi, love your story. such fun, Now l dont want to upset you but l'm going to make these cutess. l cant help myself lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that made me lol for real. Have fun!!

      PS
      You've been warned tho.... :D

      Delete

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